KATHMANDU – Saturday late evening, 1st September 2018, was raining and cool breeze was touching my face, feeling my chest and hitting legs. I was in shorts returning home on bike. I was in speed since I didn’t want to get wet. Cough and cold already caught me last week. I reached home and “a drunk woman was lying on the road in our area and she was surrounded by a big crowd”, my wife and kids said while I was parking the bike. Such cases of drunken man or woman were not the case first time for me. I found a lot while roaming around Kathmandu and jogging around Pashupati area. I just went to observe.
I found a woman – drunken, surrounded by people and crying in heavy rain at the night. I saw two policemen on bike and someone was telling to resolve the problem. Police said, “it is always the case. She is always drunk.” They left the scene immediately without any action. I observed as usual case when I just reached. Later, I found many young women were shouting to leave the place immediately. They were forcing her to leave, but no one was daring to touch her. In encounter, drunk woman shouted out using f-words and gentle women of my area reinforcing to leave the area immediately. Someone said, “Don’t touch her. Even police wore gloves to take her from road to roadside.” It seemed nobody was helping her to resettle but enforcing to leave the area they lived. People were murmuring.
I called in 100 for police and control room referred to call area police station – Gaushala. I called and requested them to help us to settle her in their custody and requested to send police with lady police too so that she could handle the case well. They promised to send someone soon.
She was in pant and t-shirt and calling her daughter unconsciously and repeatedly. At first, I requested gentle women of my area to talk in mild voice with her. They said, “Dai, she does not take us seriously.” There was a call in her mobile. She picked up the phone. Her mobile was not smart phone and was keypad system. A lady of my area snatched her phone, immediately, she stood up to get the phone and she lost her balance and fell hard on the road again. Her backside of head was hardly hit on the road and she was crying very loudly. She was out of control. She was not listening anyone else there. She was crying and saying f-words to gentle women. Someone took her at the roadside again and gave her phone to me to find out her information.
Since it was not smart phone, it was hard to find out details in phone. No numbers were saved in name and hard to find out details. I called in few numbers from recent call records of her phone and talked with people. Least people knew her, and I got few details about her from her calls. She was “Rita Karki” from Dhulikhel, working as a labor and living in Sinamangal nowadays with her daughter.
Almost after an hour, two police men came. A police man said, “It is always the case. She drisks often and she has been in custody two-three times.”
I dared to talk first time. I pronounced her name “Rita” gently. Immediately, she replied, “Hajur” very gently. “Let’s go to home. Your daughter is waiting for you. Let’s go”, I said. She replied, “Okay, Dada, let’s go.” I gave my hands to hold her and said, “For a moment, please take rest at the roadside where you would not wet by the rain.” It was drizzling, and I wanted to take her in safe place until police arrived. She was totally uncontrolled but conscious as human who needed respect. She seemed unconscious for all but in conscious with unconscious mind that nobody recognized it. Understanding of Psycho-Cybernetic is very important in such crisis to handle.
One of the women said to me, “Dai (brother), she obeys you, let’s take her out of our area. We (women) will hold her, just you say to move.” This statement enforced me to scrutinize the case in deeper level.
After few minutes, police van reached to the spot with a lady police. I requested Rita again, “Let’s go to home and your daughter.” She gave her hand to hold and a lady police also held her too. We took her into van and I said, “Go to home, you daughter is waiting for you.” She shouted to come along with her and said, “Dada, dada, …” Gentle women in my area were laughing loud saying, “It seems like a scene of farewell of sister in wedding.” The police van went at 11pm and I reached home.
The show was the end to all, but the show was barking many questions in my mind and my mind was analyzing each actor involved in the incident which appeared very differently in this case.
The first question in my mind was 1. Why gentle women of my area were blunt with her. Other questions were: 2. Many women blaming her for her situation and unsocialized behavior and mistake, but should they behave her inhuman? 3. Taking Rita out of my area is ultimate solution? 3. Police said, “They don’t have provision or any cell to take her in custody.” Why do the police settle her? And 4. Why did she listen my voice?
I learned that anyone is always in sensitivity with their unconscious mind thought one is uncontrolled with one’s conscious mind. Respecting one is a way to deal and peach out your agenda. It is short term strategy to manage the crisis on the ground. However, this case is an example of thousands of cases of current social disputes of family and crisis in social relationship, faith and bonds not only among family members but also among members of our society.
Not only respect from a man to woman but also the respect from a woman to a woman helps to settle social issues and resolves disputes very easily and love for woman build strong bonds not only among family members but also in society.
I could though give the solutions of each question raised into my mind into this article like individual behavior, law provision of police and understanding the incident with psycho-cybernetic prospective, I portraited an incident which left many questions to me to scrutinize face of human society.
At closing the story, you can win with everyone, even enemy, with respect and love and specially in above case, lack of respect for a woman especially from woman made unstable her. Ladies! Respect a woman in the first and talk with love and care to resolve the problem together.
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