BHAKTAPUR, 2nd December 2016 – “Came a new driver”, said Shiva. “Yes Sir I am”, I expressed gently. Conversation was started with chilliest since we were together from childhood. We were schoolmate and we were in a party of Surya Darshan (“Barha” in Newari) of friend’s daughter – Sulochana’s.
After a party one of my friends, Krishnashwori asked for a lift in my car with her husband and a son. We moved together from the party to her home in Kamal Vinayak. It was about 9pm. After dropping them while I was driving, a woman gave me a signal at a roadside for a lift again. The road was very silent with few lights. I stopped the car and she immediately tried to enter into front seat but the doors were locked with security measure I have installed for security of children into my car. I turned off engine and then doors were unlocked and opened the door for her. Immediately, she sat in, “Please drop me at Jagati (one of nearer place from Kamal Vinak)”, she said. I turned on engine and move ahead. “Boss F**Ked and didn’t give money – Sahule garera aja paisai diyena, saa** (exactly in Nepali)”, she said using “F” words before I did ask anything. I was confused and asked again what he did. “F**K and I work in restaurant-hotel”, she said. I started to know more about the case why she was along there and what was happened with her actually.
“I can’t go rental home in Thimi now since it would be closed now and I didn’t have money now. I have to stay in hotel tonight.”, she just expressed with loud. On the way, I asked age and about her husband. “I am 30 and I was here in Bhaktapur since 6 years. I had husband but I gave up”, she said with very confidently. I, “Why did you leave your husband?” “Chode, kin chahiyo ra logne, boy friend chadai cha ni (exactly in Nepali) – gave up husband, why do I need husband, I have body friend now”, she said. I was shocked. I was just waiting to reach Jagati to drop her as soon as possible since I was scared, but I don’t know why! On the way she said, “I don’t worry since that man has been in relation with me since eight months and I have done abortion of his fits twice and I have papers of abortion”. She didn’t stop and continue her voice, “Though he has wife and two kids, he is with me in physical relation and I also don’t leave him. I don’t let him to leave, if so, I would conceive his child and ask for marriage. I know there is provision of DNA testing.” She again did not stop even I asked,”Is it good that you are doing?” She continued again, “I don’t let him go without anything whether he has to accept me or he has to address my demand.” Her name is Sonu (probably fake name). I just ran away to my home in Sinamangal after immediate dropping her in Jagati. Before leaving my car she asked for five hundred rupee for hotel. I refused twice intentionally saying “I don’t have” and she left the car.
I regret not give money for such needy in silent night. I didn’t help money to needy woman in silent night. I was scared at that time and wanted to leave her as soon as possible since I was scared of being hostage of any incident she might act – as my mind just perceived and by law woman are powerful too. Really, at the ending of Jagati – her station while asking for five hundred rupees, my mind was just thinking of possible malicious act if I refused giving money to her. I am scared of “Gender Base Violence”, “Violence again Women” in which prominently man are considered to act. I was really scared of her thoughtful, plan and awareness of woman power to morph any life toward her willingness. I took to hill immediately she got out from my car.
A conversation of few minutes with a woman was eye-opener of power, that I ever believe, of woman to build or destroy the world.